oh, it'll be a SIMPLE wedding

so, it turns out planning a small wedding/big party is no small task.
in our minds it was gonna be so easy.
we only had two things to sort out:

1. ceremony
2. party

well, apparently it's more than just numbers one and two. there are other considerations (sub-headings). including, but not limited to, the following:

1. ceremony
a. where
b. when
c. whom to invite
d. whom to perform the ceremony
e. when to use "who" vs. "whom?"
f. will there be music
g. will people sit?
h. will there be walking down an aisle?
i. when will the music be played, if there is music?
j. if there's walking down an aisle, who walks with whom?
k. will there be flowers?
l. what will we wear?
m. what?! wedding rings are different than engagement rings?!
n. where do we get rings?
o. do people need to eat at the wedding if there's gonna be food at the party?
p. yes. what will they eat?
q. do you think our families will get along? or should we do separate ceremonies for each family?
r. what are vows?
s. what do we say in our vows?
t. are there special lighting considerations?
u. when can we start drinking?
v. oh, you're wearing THAT?
w. what if someone objects to these two getting married? is it acceptable to kick them in the balls or lady balls? because, seriously, why would you object?
x. do we provide the rice for people to throw when we leave?
y. what kind of rice? would quinoa be an acceptable alternative?
z. where do we find empty soup cans to hang from behind the car when we drive away?
aa. who eats soup from cans anymore?
bb. would a harry potter themed wedding be tacky? rose would really like that, i think.

2. party
a. guest list
b. that's a clever way to avoid trying to chose between "whom to invite" and "who to invite."
c. location
d. food. what to get and how much?
e. most of my family only eats real meat and we only eat make believe meat. can we make everyone happy?
f. NO.
g. how much booze do we get?
h. can we just play music from an ipod or do we need a dj?
i. if we just play music from an ipod, everyone will need a turn with the headphones.
j. do we need tables?
k. will there be double dutch?
l. YES.
m. do we change outfits for the party?
n. how much booze is acceptable to drink at your wedding party?
o. is it unacceptable to charge admission?
p. if we get tables, who sets them up and who cleans up after?
q. are there gonna be special dances? dad/bride. mom/groom. bride/groom. electric slide. macarena?
r. since this is happening on new years eve, can we convince everyone in the room that all the celebrations in, like, times square new york and under the space needle are in our honor?
s. can we call it "honour" like we're british?
t. will any single friends of ours hook up?
u. do there need to be flowers here too?
v. i suppose now you're gonna tell me there's a different ring for the wedding party too?!
w. can we get a ride home? seriously, we'll be in NO shape to drive.

oh, what am i forgetting? i'm sure there's something.

at least we have each other.